Ashes in the Light

The last three weeks at work have been… quiet.

Not the kind of quiet where there’s nothing to do — far from it. There’s still work, still messages, still things to follow up on. But quiet in a different way.

Quiet in terms of styling and floral work.

The kind of work that usually fills my days with movement, colours, and something tangible at the end of it. The kind of work that makes me feel like I’ve created something, even if it’s just for a moment.

And without it, I’ve been feeling a little… off.

A little more lethargic than usual.
A little more tired, even without doing “as much”.
And somehow, a bit jaded.

It’s strange how that works.

You would think having less of the physically demanding work would feel like a break. But instead, it feels like something is missing — like a rhythm I’ve gotten used to has suddenly slowed down in a way I didn’t expect.

But maybe that’s exactly it.

Maybe this is what slowing down actually feels like — not always peaceful, not always refreshing, but unfamiliar. A little uncomfortable, even.

I think I’ve been so used to moving — doing, creating, responding — that when things soften, I don’t immediately know what to do with the stillness.

And instead of filling it, or rushing to find something to replace it, I’m trying to just sit with it.

To let it be quiet.
To let it feel slow.
To not force myself to feel “productive” all the time.

Maybe not every season is meant to feel exciting.
Maybe some are meant to feel like a pause — even if it’s a slightly restless one.

And maybe this is part of the same lesson I’ve been learning lately:

that slowing down isn’t always comfortable,
but it’s still necessary.

And I’m learning to ease into it,
one quiet day at a time.